2 Months!!

My little Thomas is TWO MONTHS OLD today!!!  Mind blown  :::explosion sound:::

Mother's Day, I already blogged about in a separate post so I won't delve any further into that weekend. The Saturday of that weekend though I stood up in a wedding for my friend from high school. It was our first official night away from Thomas and with his lack of sleeping you can imagine that we were home pretty early! It was fun to get dressed up and have my hair and makeup done though since I've been feeling frumpy so it was sure a nice pick me up! On the plus side, my bridesmaid dress had to be altered and re-altered because it was too big. Heehee :) Here are some cute pictures of us from the wedding!!

 

The week after the wedding/Mother's Day I had my 6 week postpartum check up with my OB. Everything looks to be healing accordingly and I was cleared for exercise other than walking, hurray!! I started a squat challenge to get my motivation back into gear. I started trying to do some other exercises like crunches and jumping jacks but I think I need to stick to motions that are NOT jumpy as the jumping motion shakes my flab which in turn shakes my incision. OUCH!! At the appointment, the OB asked me what form of birth control we'd be using. When I said, "None" , he gave me a pretty funny look. I told him that if we wound up back in his office without stopping at our infertility doctor first we'd go buy a lottery ticket. Obviously a "free baby" would be a miracle that would be most welcome so we're not concerned!! We got the cutest bib from the OB for Thomas... but its too cute to use so I'm just keeping it in his dresser :)

 





That same week of my 6 week pp checkup, I got to cash in on my "push present". Typically a push present is a nice piece of jewelry but mine was a day at the spa!!  For me, that is so much better than jewelry as I'm not a jewelry wearing person. Now the spa? That is definitely something that I can enjoy and it was MUCH needed by that point!! I started with a papaya scrub wrap, they had me take a hot shower afterwards. Let me tell you....being able to take a hot shower without having a baby screaming for me to pick him up was the best part. I got to stay in there for as long as I wanted, ahhhh wonderful. Then , I had an hour full body massage. Lunch from Panera. A facial and ending with a manicure. I left there completely relaxed and refreshed!!!

The following weekend was the annual Promise Walk for Preeclampsia. It was hard to believe its been a year already. Last year we had our team "Jogging for Jack" and raised close to $2000. This year, being in recovery from my csection I wasn't sure that I'd be able to walk it so I didn't put the team back together and just volunteered instead. Closer to the date of the walk, I actually realized I could have been fine to walk it afterall but had my SIL's baby shower to attend instead so that squashed any chance of walking this year. Next year for sure we'll do it and have a team and actually enjoy the day instead of only standing around a table selling merchandise. Its really the walk itself that is what the day is all about and makes it enjoyable. However, I was happy that I at least could be a part of the day even in a small part! Plus I got an extra shirt!:)

So now my little baby is 2 months old today. At his 2 month checkup, he was 9lbs and 19 3/4 inches long. According to the growth chart, his weight gain keeps him on track yet his growth was not enough to keep him on the chart. His pediatrician seems to think he was measured incorrectly so that its possible he grew enough if that was the case. Regardless, it wasn't too far off from where he should be so we'll just check him out at his 4 month check up and see how much he's grown then. He had one shot at his last doctors appointment but at this check up he had 2 shots and one oral medication. He was not a happy camper and all I have to say is TGFT (Thank Goodness for Tylenol) oh my goodness for a solid two days he was a crabby cakes!!!  The second you'd give him the Tylenol though , all smiles. As part of his measurements, we discovered that his head circumference grew again. It was in the 77th percentile at his one month check up but now was in the 86th percentile. Jim and his family have large heads so the pediatrician was pretty sure it was just a familial thing but since Jack had Dandy Walker, a brain malformation, she ordered a head ultrasound of Thomas just to be sure everything was ok. He also needed a hip ultrasound since he was breech. I myself was breech and born with my hip out of place, which my mom thinks was due to my position, so we were happy to get both done and make sure everything is a-ok with our baby.

Later that week I took Thomas to the hospital to get his ultrasounds done. They had us sitting in the waiting room for over 1/2 hour so by the time we got called back, Thomas was squawking pretty loud!! He started making really loud grunting noises and then I started smelling something stinky, haha. Sure enough he left a little surprise in there just in time to have his ultrasounds. I ended up having to change him on the ultrasound table before they got started!! He didn't care for the head ultrasound, which I don't blame him. I had to hold his head in one position very still....which is impossible!! He was getting soooo mad that I wouldn't let him move his head around. When they put him on his side to scan his hip, he was a different baby. I think he actually liked laying on his side because he looked really content like that and didn't move an inch! We're still waiting to hear back from the results but I feel pretty good that both will be fine.

What is Thomas up to this month? Well.... he is still wearing mostly newborn clothes but slowly moving into his 0-3 month outfits. Mostly all onesies and shirts will fit but he needs to wear newborn pants. Its getting fun dressing him now that he's able to wear outfits! Here are a couple of our favorite outfits this month!

Thomas is not a fan of tummy time. We have tried it a few times but he falls asleep!! When he's on his back though he stays awake and seems more alert. He doesn't swat at his toys quite yet but he is putting his hands on his bottle while drinking and the other day he actually pulled his own paci out of his mouth!!

It seems as though we have found his winning combination of formula and medication. We switched him around 2 weeks ago to Similac Alimentum. He has been doing so much better with that plus the Prevacid. Of course its the most expensive type of Similac they sell but I'm of the belief that I'll pay any amount of money for formula if it stops him from screaming 24/7!!  Since he has been on the formula, he is now drinking 5oz bottles!!!  Also, almost every night this last week he has slept 6-7 consecutive hours at night without waking up for a bottle. Hallelujah!!!

Now that brings us to this weekend to round out the month! Yesterday Jim and I went out for a date night downtown. We really needed to spend some time together just us! We tried to go to the Field Museum for the Vikings exhibit but it was sold out. Instead we decided to go to the Planetarium. It was a great time and we saw a few "movies" there, one was 3d!!

 

After the Planetarium, we went to leave and head out to dinner but there was a torrential downpour outside!! There were a ton of people all crowding around the doors because they didn't want to go out in the rain. They pretty much kicked us all out as it was closing time so Jim and I ran to the bus stop and hopped on the bus that was waiting there before all the other people had that idea too. We were a little wet then, but when we got off the bus and started walking to dinner at The Melting Pot, we got sooooaked!!!!  Of course neither of us had an umbrella!!! But it was worth it for the amazing meal we had....mmmmmmm my favorite place ever!!!

Which brings us to today.... Thomas' two month birthday!!!  My cousin and his kids came over to meet him and they had so much fun taking turns holding him! They've been talking about meeting baby Thomas for so long I'm glad they were finally able to come by and meet him. We tried taking his 2 month pictures this morning but he was being very uncooperative. I had to put the paci in his mouth to get a good picture, haha!!! Our Molly Bear still hasn't arrived yet so next month I'm sure we'll be able to start using that in his monthly pictures. For now this is what we've got!!

 

Just for fun....here are then and now pictures of my cousin's. First picture is me holding them, second is them holding Thomas. Oh how quickly time flies!

 

Jimmy...

 



Suzy and Maggie...

 



 

Sophie...

 



1st Earthly Mother's Day/ Jack's Due Date

Mother's Day is something most woman eagerly anticipate before they have children. You picture someday getting served breakfast in bed by your husband and bright eyed children, cards and cute little art projects, a day of celebration of you and appreciation for bringing life into the world.

I , like those other woman, also had such lofty expectations and while it would be some time before the cute art projects started rolling in, I had such excitement for what my first Mother's Day would be like. To hold that baby and to know I brought him/her into this world and have everyone around me celebrate....it would be amazing.

However, every year that went by without being pregnant or having a glimmer of hope of having a child the following Mother's Day, my vision of that perfect Mother's Day slowly and gradually began to fade. Maybe I'd never get that perfect Mother's Day that I'd envisioned for so long. Then came Jack. Not only was I going to finally be a mother but my miracle baby was actually DUE on Mother's Day. You don't get much more perfect than that.

Then he was gone.

When Mother's Day/ Jack's Due Date arrived last year it was the 2nd hardest day of my life. The first of course being the day he was born. We released balloons and Jim and I spent the day downtown to just have some us time. We wanted to light a candle at Old St. Patrick's Church downtown but they didn't have candles so instead we wrote prayers in the prayer book for our little Jack.

I was a Mother but no one was celebrating me. Some people recognized me but it wasn't a day of happiness and joy as I had pictured.

This journey has taught me a lot and my hardest lesson to learn has been that you can't plan everything in your life. Things don't always go the way you want or the way you think they should. Sometimes life throws you a curve ball and you just have to figure out the best way to duck.

Here we are a year later. Jack would have been a year old.... maybe walking? Would he be starting to talk? How many teeth would he have? All these questions we'll never know but now we get to see them in person with his little brother Thomas.

Today of all days, May 11th.... I just looked at Thomas' face and said "Thank you Jack.... you're not here but you picked out a pretty amazing little brother for your Mommy and Daddy to take care of here on Earth." 

Mother's Day this year was our first with a child in our arms after so many years of wondering if it would ever happen. Thomas has been an amazing gift to us and we're so thankful to be blessed to be his parents. We didn't make too much of a big deal out of the day. I don't think it will ever feel right to celebrate Mother's Day the way that I pictured it to be years ago....and I'm fine with that. I don't need a celebration, I just need my little boy he's enough of a celebration for me.

One Month!!! (a few days late)

I absolutely cannot believe I'm writing this post already....but Thomas is one month old!!! Time after pregnancy is going much faster than it did when I was pregnant. One month pregnancy time felt like 6 months normal time whereas one month Thomas time feels like a week. He's been such a joy and light to our lives and I'm so, so happy being his mommy.

Recovery Update-
At my 2 week post partum date, I had my incision check. Up until that date I hadn't been able to drive (regardless that I had stopped taking the high level pain meds over a week prior) and Jim was driving me everywhere. Thankfully my incision looked great and was given the clearance to drive and regain light/moderate activity. Naturally, knowing me, that means throw strollers into the trunk, carry heavy boxes of Summer clothes up three flights of stairs, etc. etc...etc.... LOL , I'm a very fidgety person can you tell?

So now I'm almost 5 weeks post partum!!  In another week I have my 6 week checkup and will hopefully get the ok to do more exercise. Although, I think regardless of what he says I may just ease into it. I took Thomas for a walk in his stroller around the block the other day.

 

I shouldn't say it was a walk around the block though because.... Mommy got tired and had to turn around, LOL. It was more of a walk down the block and turn around to come home. Haha.

However, carrying him around in general and/or in his carseat plus getting rid of all the fluid from the C-section I'm officially now 6lbs under my pre-pregnancy weight. Matter of fact, I'm pretty sure my stomach is flatter now than it was before I got pregnant. I'm seriously a freak of nature, for real. Anything pregnancy related that "should" happen, with me the opposite happens....good or bad. Although now that I can eat whatever I want again I'm sure this wont last long!!!  For the moment though, I'm enjoying this skinny mommy body :)

Thomas sees the world-
Thomas has been out and about with his Momma quite a bit lately. We try to limit ourselves to one "adventure" a day because taking him around to too many places doesn't really make him too happy. We've ventured out to Target numerous times and have gone couponing at CVS as well. We have been attempting to babywear and he seems to like it!!

Reflux-
About 2 weeks ago Jim went back to work and its been really difficult. Actually difficult is an understatement....its been pretty brutal. Basically since he's on midnights I'm up with Thomas all night (which I'll delve into next) and then I have him all day while Jim sleeps. I'm ex-freakin-hausted. The getting up periodically for feedings wouldn't be quite so bad but Thomas seems to have silent reflux and we've been working on making things a little more comfortable for him. His pediatrician at first switched his formula to a sensitive one and suggested we try gas drops when at first it seemed like just a gas issue. That didn't work so great and then he started then coughing and struggling to drink his bottle (which he's still on a relatively small amount... like 2-2.5 oz per bottle). Plus afterwards he makes the most heartbreaking noises like he's so uncomfortable! It just breaks my heart that he's having a tough time! His pediatrician then gave us a script for baby Zantac but over the course of the four days he took it, his symptoms got progressively worse until last night finally I just didn't give him the nighttime dose. He's not sleeping well, not eating well, so it doesn't seem like its working for him. Instead, tonight we gave him a little dose of Gripe Water and we'll see how he does with that instead. So far...while I'm typing, after the dose I put him in his swing (which I finally put batteries in and can use the vibration feature!!!) he fell asleep right away and has been asleep 2 hours! Eeeep!!!  After last night's 8 hour scream fest...yes 8 hours.... we BOTH could use a decent nights sleep. If the combo gripe water and swing work then tomorrow the swing is moving from our living room to the bedroom so momma can sleep in her own bed!! Fingers crossed!!

One month updates-
Random nicknames for Thomas include: "Tdog"  "Tbone" the up and coming in popularity "Toot Toot Thomas" or "Toots" for short. Also up and coming "Chubbalub" or "Chubs" and according to Jim and his family "Tommy Boy".

So what's Thomas up to now that he's a month old already you may wonder?? Besides being awake all the time of course, LOL!!!  He's smiling a lot more!!!  A lot of smiles are when he's asleep but he has started smiling for us when he's awake.

He's also showing interest in holding his own bottle!!

He weighs 7lbs 2oz and is 19 inches long now. His current weight is what we anticipated him weighing last month at birth! He has moved out of the preemie clothes and fits pretty decently into newborn clothes. He's still swimming in newborn onesies and I finally found that the Circo brand at Target has pants that fit his little skinny legs so now he has pants! We'd like to start making a schedule or routine for him for when I go back to work but at this point, just getting him to sleep at night is good enough for me. The rest we'll figure out later I suppose!! Here are some random monthly pictures of our little Thomas!

 

Thomas and Jack-
Although Thomas does have a brother he clearly won't be able to have the same relationship that most brothers do. That doesn't mean that it cant be special in its own way. We have a Molly Bear on order hopefully arriving by the end of this month. I'm going to be having Thomas' monthly pictures have the Molly Bear included with him. That way its as close as possible to having Jack in his pictures with him. I snapped this photo a few weeks ago of my two boys.

I'm honestly starting to get the pangs of sadness coming in again though, they come and go like the tide with the ebb and flow. Its not quite as overwhelming now that Thomas is here and I have so much to be thankful for with him in my life. Its still there though ready to pop up when I least expect it. Recently, I realized next week would have been Jack's 1st birthday. Suddenly the sadness popped up again. Honestly, I wonder if those moments will ever go away completely. There is always going to be something that comes up that Jack should have been doing and wont get the chance to. Its a strange feeling being an Earth mom and an Angel mom trying to balance your mind between both children. I am looking forward to watching Thomas grow and talking to him about his big brother Jack so that he's a part of his life even though he can't be present for it.