Changes

This weekend we've decided some changes around here are going to be made.

First.... If Jack isn't sleeping in the empty room than no baby will. We're moving Jim's man cave to that room, painting it the color that would have been the nursery and moving the few nursery items into what is now the man cave. Any future baby will have a new room painted a different color someday.


Second.... the clothes in the closet? Phsssst.... going, going, gone. If we have another baby someday and its a girl, she can't wear the clothes for a boy. If we have another baby someday and its another boy, I don't feel right about having another baby wearing what Jack didn't get to. I thought about maybe giving them to friends with babies since there are so god damn many of them but ummmm, nope. I don't want to see someone else's baby wearing what Jack was supposed to either. So off to Goodwill they go. I bought two garbage bags full of clothes from a woman on Facebook for $60 so its not like we're losing money on this. Someone else can have the clothes we bought which I'm happy to share with someone else and its the best way to do it where I'd never have to see the recipient wearing them. If you're interested in them start checking Goodwill stores around New Lenox, there are some really adorable duckie sleeper sacks about to be put on the racks. Newly (well in the last 4 months) washed and everything!! Even still smells like our laundry detergent, win!

Third... Jim and I made a deal that if we have another baby we're not buying anything. No clothes, no furniture, no bottles or wipes, nothing.  I'm on board with that 100%.... if a baby comes home with us from the hospital next time we will just have to stop at BRU to do some quick shopping.

Fourth...pretty sure I'm going to need to rid myself of Facebook soon. I've already unfollowed most of my friends online. If you are thinking of having a baby, newly married potentially going to get pregnant any day now, pregnant currently, or have children then your updates most definitely don't come up in my news feed. Basically, I see a lot of coupon tips, recipes, and infertility organizations on my feed. Not bad, but every once and awhile I want to make myself suffer and check on my friends pages. It never makes me happy just more upset and anxious so why even bother? I'm still trying to decide about this because I'm manning my 5k fundraising page and I'm very dedicated to that...plus I have a Facebook page for my blog here! So I'm not really sure how that would work if I left Facebook, if I could still maintain those two pages. Hmmm....well  see!


So hopefully some of these things will settle my mind a little more. I'd hate to go into another FET with nothing but negativity but its difficult to rid myself of it when its all around me.

Speaking of which... tomorrow is my second pointless beta. So excited to get up at 5am to get bloodwork done from my already bruised up hands to confirm that I'm not pregnant so that I can reschedule the hysteroscopy. I'm hopeful that by next weekend I'll have it completed and be able to focus on our next steps. Even if we wanted to, which we don't, we wouldn't have enough time to get into the FET for April. However, to plan for it mid/end of May I'd have to start the Lupron soon I'd imagine. I'd like to skip this week and fast forward to next weekend please.